Christmas has come early with Rick returning to me the Precious Folder containing my collection of colour sample cards for paint.
I appreciate that as a comparatively functional human being I really shouldn't own such a thing, let alone admit to it. My life doesn't revolve around a games console, I don't have a penchant for trigonometry and I can't quote anything by Stephen Hawkins. I can talk to people face-to-face in a really very pleasant manner - not at all like those boys in the Department of Computation* at the University where I was temping, who may well have been the next Einstein but blushed and stammered furiously at every exchange. Bless them, it was possibly the first time they had spoken/mumbled to a real-life unrelated female.
However, I'm a shameless geek when it comes to all things decorating.
I can't quite seem to help myself picking up a handful of the little colour cards from the special display cabinet every time I go to B&Q. I love Farrell & Ball and I have a special place in my heart for Craig & Rose. The words Laura and Ashley spoken in the same sentence can unleash an unbridled passion Jane Austen would have shied away from. But all of this is, I believe, forgivable. Let's be honest, the Laura Ashley catalogue and magazines of the 'Period Home' ilk are house porn and I have a number of friends who like to indulge. Sharing house porn isn't quite as unsavoury as its earthier cousin - it's quite acceptable practice actually.
The shameful bit is owning a file in which I've organised catalogues, brochures, colour cards and magazine articles. It makes me feel a bit like a serial killer. Normal on the outside "oooh, she seemed so nice, you'd never have known!" but freaky obsessive in the comfort of my own home.
* I still think they made that word up - the person who founded that particular department may well have been terribly clever with computers but I suspect a poor grasp of English.
Saturday 23 December 2006
Wednesday 20 December 2006
Added Boswelox
I wonder if you have enjoyed, as I have, the televisual treat which is the Mandle Candle advertisement?
When is a candle more than a candle? When it's a Mandle Candle!
'Sets the mood for a party'. Are you sure? Is that not a very shit party if you need a candle changing colour from one vile shade to another to set the mood for it?
Great advert though, you can feel the sincerity. I wonder if the voiceover man speaks like that all the time. Would love to see his wife bristle as he comes home with a new gadget to tell her all about. Maybe he lives with Barry Scott from the Cilit Bang advert, suspect they'd be an excellent love match.
When is a candle more than a candle? When it's a Mandle Candle!
'Sets the mood for a party'. Are you sure? Is that not a very shit party if you need a candle changing colour from one vile shade to another to set the mood for it?
Great advert though, you can feel the sincerity. I wonder if the voiceover man speaks like that all the time. Would love to see his wife bristle as he comes home with a new gadget to tell her all about. Maybe he lives with Barry Scott from the Cilit Bang advert, suspect they'd be an excellent love match.
Hallelujah!
Joy of Joys! As if by magic I have been purchased a tin of Alphabetti Spaghetti by my christmas fairy friend, giving me hope for all manner of things. Admittedly it's not actually called that anymore, but what joy, what rapture, what delight upon opening the wrapping paper to reveal the golden light of Heinz Alphabetti shining forth.
I am a bit taken aback upon closer inspection to find that it's made from multigrain pasta shapes and is fortified with vitamins and iron. Whatever next? Nutritious Warburtons Toastie and red jam? Pot Noodles with health-giving properties? McDonalds burgers made from meat?
Oooh, but I would be quite giddy if it were possible to get 100% RDA of everything for robust health and be slender and glowing from a diet of - for example - golden syrup and hazelnut spread on toast for breakfast, a light lunch of Sports Mixture and a packet of those bacon fries crisps thingies and a box of chocolates and bottle of cava for dinner! Mmmmm. Ideal world.
I am a bit taken aback upon closer inspection to find that it's made from multigrain pasta shapes and is fortified with vitamins and iron. Whatever next? Nutritious Warburtons Toastie and red jam? Pot Noodles with health-giving properties? McDonalds burgers made from meat?
Oooh, but I would be quite giddy if it were possible to get 100% RDA of everything for robust health and be slender and glowing from a diet of - for example - golden syrup and hazelnut spread on toast for breakfast, a light lunch of Sports Mixture and a packet of those bacon fries crisps thingies and a box of chocolates and bottle of cava for dinner! Mmmmm. Ideal world.
Wednesday 6 December 2006
Tuesday 5 December 2006
Flumdoo
Finally got YouTube to co-operate, no doubt to the delight of my colleagues. I am certain they enjoyed, as I did, Duran Duran's Wild Boys, which was obviously my first port of call when offered a database of every imaginable video in the history of the world.
Imagine my disappointment to discover that the cutting edge design and technology of the day now looks shite and, I'd go so far as to say (forgive me HP), embarrassing. I should have left it unsullied in my memory as being the best video I ever remember seeing. The veil has been lifted from my eyes and I am the poorer for it. Though there was a genuis bit where one band member was tied to his car bonnet, thrashing in agony as he was subjected to the indignity of having his own image flashed at him from an overhead screen. I doubt I'd have thought it so amusing when it was made, but retropectively I can fully appreciate that a reality check of my 80's make-up & hair 'style' would indeed be torture.
Imagine my disappointment to discover that the cutting edge design and technology of the day now looks shite and, I'd go so far as to say (forgive me HP), embarrassing. I should have left it unsullied in my memory as being the best video I ever remember seeing. The veil has been lifted from my eyes and I am the poorer for it. Though there was a genuis bit where one band member was tied to his car bonnet, thrashing in agony as he was subjected to the indignity of having his own image flashed at him from an overhead screen. I doubt I'd have thought it so amusing when it was made, but retropectively I can fully appreciate that a reality check of my 80's make-up & hair 'style' would indeed be torture.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)